Simply put, many people don’t consider online chatting/sex to be cheating.
But, the problem with this is twofold: Because online chatting/sex is rewarding but not very costly (one can easily control how, when, and where it happens), people are easily drawn to it.
I told him I felt bad that he was looking at the pictures; obviously I’m not what he was looking at.
I told him I wasn’t like those girls, he told me he didn’t want me to be like those girls...
I’ve been with my fiancé for a little over 2.5 years now. We’ve lived an hour apart for our entire relationship except for the past month or so, I’m in the middle of moving in.
We’d still see each other every weekend, sometimes more.
Eventually, he went and deleted all the pornography and included the pictures of that girl. I finally broke down, I knew his email password, and I know it’s wrong, but it didn’t stop me, I just needed to know if he was talking to anyone-more than just friends.
He said it was to put an end to everything and I should never doubt his love for me. Well, I continued to use his computer and I would check every once in awhile just to see if I’d find any new pics of any girls. I was searching for a site I had gone to before so I pulled down the bar where you can see past sites visited and ratemybody.com, adultfriendfinder and others were listed. I understand what these sites are and at first I just thought he was going to them just to look at the women. So I found emails from adultfriendfinder telling him he’s got new matches or so and so was contacting him.
What do you think and can you help as to what I should do. The feelings that you are experiencing now are very similar to what people experience when they discover infidelity.
At an emotional level there is very little difference between discovering different types of cheating—it all hurts just the same (see what counts as cheating).
I just don’t know how to handle this whole thing, I love him dearly and it hurts very badly...
He’s got so many good qualities and in my heart I feel as though he truly loves me, would never hurt me, but-I know I’ve babbled, I just wanted to make sure everything was clear. On one hand, your boyfriend has been turning to other women for sexual gratification—leaving you feeling hurt, betrayed and rejected.
I told him I felt bad that he was looking at these women-but I felt even worse because I was the one who looked it up in his documents on his computer-I felt I invaded his privacy-I didn’t want to be one of those crazy girlfriends/fiancés.