So today, I’m going to give you my Dating Coach advice so you’ll know exactly what you need to do in order to build attraction over text.The first thing you need to do is to act as if you’re already close – this immediately puts the other person at ease and takes the pressure off.
The phenomenon was first reported on by The Wall Street Journal, which coined the term "bluffting": a text with a little bluffing.
Sherry Turkle, a psychologist in science, technology and society at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, told the newspaper: "It's perfect for manipulation.
"All the various forms of communication have a stumbling block and because people always have their phones on them and check them all the time, you have to be careful about how you deal with texts; you don't want to look like you're waiting by the phone," says Hayley Quinn, a dating coach and writer, specialising in the arts of conversation, persuasion and seduction.
"Because we get texts quickly and easily, we become very aware if someone hasn't chosen to respond."It would seem that everyone is in need of a little help when it comes to technologically managing their love lives.
The worst thing you can do is send another text a few minutes (or hours) later to ask if they got your first message or to demand to know why they didn’t reply.
This can look needy and desperate, killing off any excitement and destroying the air of mystery.
Others send late-night texts pretending to be drunk (complete with deliberate spelling errors for extra realism) to see how the receiver responds.
Another common tactic includes responding to a text from a known contact with a withering "Sorry, who is this? Some send a text, complete with a term of endearment, which appears to be written for someone else, in the hope of making the receiver jealous. At best, this sort of behaviour could make you seem uninterested and cold, and, at worst, leave you looking plain rude. So what is it about texting that makes otherwise normal adults descend into such childish behaviour when they would never consider it in another form?
When you do message them, make it count and make sure you get them thinking.
Something like this perfect: ‘Bet you can’t guess what I’m doing right now…x’ ‘Don’t plan anything Friday…because I’ve got plans for you!
But it is also categorically "game playing", something that many people actively seek to do while others would be horrified if they thought they were participating in such a performance.